Hanging on and letting go...

My sister added a little surprise for me in the birthday box that arrived in August for my dearly beloved -- a bar of beautifully wrapped and scented violet soap. The wrapping was so pretty that I decided to see if I could get the soap out without destroying the paper in the process.

 
Soap is one of those gifts that I absolutely love, but like food, is also a consumable – once it is gone, it is well and truly gone. I wanted to hold on to the memory of having received the beautiful soap, but I also wanted to use it.

My experiment was successful.

The Sunday before my birthday I was rooting around in the top drawer of my dresser to see if I could find some socks that more or less matched what I was wearing to church and came upon a bar of sandalwood soap. This was the last birthday present our son gave me. I was going to save it forever, and had promptly buried under the clothes in the top drawer where it had sat ever since. I will never get another birthday present from our son. Ever.

I have been gradually moving to a place where it is now a little easier for me to let go of some of these physical things that link my memories of him to him. I am more accepting now that my memories of him don’t depend on clinging to these things.

Having had success at liberating the first bar of soap from its wrapper, I got out his bar of soap and carefully removed it from the wrapper as well. And I started to use it.

A few days before my birthday, a box arrived from my sister and her girls and in it was yet another bar of wonderful soap, and so the wrapper for this soap has been preserved as well.

 Other things were in the box besides the soap. There is a wonderful store near where they live called World Market that has amazing “craft type” things from all over the globe. All sorts of interesting little goodies were in the box, including this fellow.

I am absolutely delighted to make his acquaintance and so pleased that he has come to stay with me for a while.