Fumble Fingers and a Slip of the Tongue

When I became a Christian, I lost most of my old vocabulary. This robs me of the necessary safety valve to handle such emergencies… ripping myself from the barbed wire… I stepped in doggie-do… I ran a thorny brier between my big toe and the toe right next door… and that which I lost I suddenly found—and a torrent of expletives issued forth…

Jamie Buckingham, "The Last Word"

Two weeks ago, we remained after church to take down the Christmas decorations. We worked as a well-oiled team. I was involved in taking the red and gold glass ball ornaments off the tree.

I fumbled one ornament and it shattered when it hit the wood steps leading to the sanctuary.

I was embarrassed, but one of the men made a joke about it and it was okay. Accidents happen.

One of the men got out the vacuum cleaner and sucked up the shards.

Later, when we were transferring some glass ball ornaments that were still in the original packaging to a special container designed to hold the ornaments, I dropped another one, and it too broke. 

I am afraid I also suddenly found what I thought I had lost. Before I could stop myself out came a four-letter word -- true, it wasn't the worst one I could have said -- but it was bad enough. In church no less. I wished a hole could have opened up and swallowed me. But it didn’t.

I hope they have forgiven me for those slips of the hand and of the tongue.

I think next year when it comes time to decorate the church for Christmas, I will find a project that does not involve glass balls.