Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Be it ever so crooked, there's no place like home.

I got home late last night and spent this first day back from my trip up to my eyeballs in new work that I had been assigned on Friday, and which is due back on Friday. I had to get organized and get everything transferred off the laptop, which went with me to California, and onto Porky, which is the name of my computer. The computers on our network are all named after characters on the Little Rascals. When Richard was assigning names to the computers, mine ended up being called Porky. Maybe he was trying to tell me something? I am no longer porky, so I may ask for a name change. Otay. I have chased that little rabbit long enough.... where was I?

Every moment I got to spend with my family in California was precious, but I was also very glad to come back to my family here and to my very humble Ozark house. The term "Ozark house" means something to people who live here. It means it was built by someone who "eyeballed" everything, probably did not have a tape measure or a plumb line, and used rough-sawn lumber.

The house is crooked. Everything in our house is crooked. We have been trying to fix it, but it is very difficult. None of the walls are straight or plumb. None of the rooms are square. In fact, one wall in our son's old bedroom is 7 inches longer than the other wall. Trying to do repairs on the house has been something of a carpenter's nightmare for Richard, who likes things to be square and straight and plumb.

Aside from the fact that part of the ceiling tiles in the living room are about to fall down, the two pressing concerns are the floor and the bathroom.

The tile is so old the pattern has been worn off. But the subfloor is not even, so we are not sure how to fix that so the tile won't crack.

Richard has been heard to comment "Somebody was very drunk when they laid the tile. It's probably the same guy who built the house in the first place and it's a shame that he didn't have a tape measure."

He has been gradually working through the house trying to fix it up a bit and straighten it out some... the bathroom is next on the list. And after he fixes the bathroom, he is not sure how he is going to get the door to hang straight, either.


Tami said...

Welcome home.

I have a crooked cottage. It's just a little tiny postage stamp that some eyeballed. Then the added the living room on and eyeballed it too.

It's the best.

Anonymous said...

I am thinking about that little song about the "Crooked Man!"

There was a crooked man and he had a crooked house....remember that one???

Glad you had a good time with the fam! Jennifer said you did!! It is always nice to get home, I agree!

RS said...

I loved having you visit!